Recently, I read a couple of articles that touted 40% of people feel intensely lonely, and the other noted that 60% of people feel unloved. That means 4.4 billion people on planet earth feel unloved at any given time (Havingtime.com, 4.4 billion people feel unloved, are you one?). That’s staggering!
The result is if you feel unloved, it is nearly impossible to love in return (Matt 22:29). The repercussions are obvious and easily seen by the expression of hate and segmentation that are seen in the world.
A Broken Society
I was mentoring a young man to try and gain breakthrough to his life, when he blurted out, “You have to understand. I’m from a broken family.” I responded, “Well, welcome to the club.” I wasn’t trying to be insensitive to his plight, or oblivious to the repercussions of a broken family and a broken soul, but to try and get him to shift his attention from being a victim to a victor. Most people today come from a broken relationship, in one way, shape, form on another. We can’t use it as an excuse but reposition ourselves to see the solution.
How Jesus Taught Love
It’s why Jesus teaches love in a profoundly different way, “This is love, not that we love God, but that He has loved us …” (1 John 4:10). Love is not something I demand of you. Instead, let me love you first. You’ll learn to be loved and intern be free to love. You’ll learn to love by being loved. Listen to how John further amplified this at the end of the same chapter, “We love, because He first loved us.” You are loved! (Say it yourself … “I am loved”).
Love Always Breaks Through
I remember a time when feeling unloved sought to dominate my life. As a young boy, a significant other encouraged me to help another significant other, who was fixing a process. As I walked into this situation, I blurted out, “I’m here to help.” In that moment, the significant other broke the faucet head. His reaction was to burst out with vivid language, “STUPID IDIOT, you’ll never amount to anything.” The impact of that moment as a young child made me feel dumb, and like I wouldn’t amount to anything. I felt unloved, unvalued, and believed I would have little impact in life. I would often self-sabotage to align with that image in my heart. It wasn’t until I looked into a new mirror of the word of God (James 1:22-24), that I could see a new reflection of who I was.
Every profound discovery of success productivity is always rooted in self-image and self-esteem; how we see ourselves in our heart. You’ll never rise above the image you have of yourself in your heart (Prov. 23:7, 4:23, Heb. 4:12). That’s why most people who don’t feel loved have a hard time loving or even stepping out to do their dreams and visions.
The key here is that God ‘s love (agape) is unconditional. God loves YOU unconditionally. The fact is you are loved … if you can only see it. Look at Romans 8:31-39.
- God is for you (8:31) – Paul iterates, “If God be for us…” Paul asks and answers the question in this passage (see verses 31-39) with a resounding, yes! We know God is able, but is He willing … for me? Let me settle the issue out Jesus’ own mouth. When the leper says to Jesus, if you’re willing you can make me clean. Jesus’ response is, “… I will” (Matt 8:3). The writer of Hebrews reiterates this for us seven times in his epistle (Heb. 8:10-12). God plus you, always equates and majority.
The reason we often think God is not for us or doesn’t love us is because we know our shortcomings, or at least these shortcomings have reiterated to us, that makes us feel uncertain of God’s love. But remember agape love is unconditional love. God loves you, because He can’t do otherwise. God doesn’t just try to love, He is love (1 John 4:16). He always has your best in mind.
You might think to yourself, that it looks like God wasn’t for some people – people in the old covenant. That’s true, but Jesus’ blood ushered us into a new covenant. God is always for you … even when you fail. You need to say it right now: God is for me. Say it four times accentuating each of the four words sequentially. God is for you!
- Romans 8 adds, “… so who can be against us?” Even if everything and everyone is against you, God is for you! If someone gives you lemons, He’ll make lemonade … if you let him. He’ll make your red sea a walkway. He’ll make your fiery furnace into a sauna. Your past doesn’t dictate to your future … unless it’s how you’ve learned to see yourself in your heart.
- Next Paul adds, “…How will he not also, along with him, give you all things.” If God gave you his most prized possession, his son, how will He not give you all things that pertain to life and godliness (2 Pet 1:3). It’s like ordering a full meal deal; the fries and coke come with the burger. Once He gave you Jesus, the rest of the kingdom comes with Him. You may have had a bad earthly father who withheld things from you, but God’s not like that. He’s ready to provide all you need from His inexhaustive supply.
- Now this text adds this incredible statement, “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble, or hardship, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or the sword” (or a bad home life, or fear, or insecurity, or failure or misdeeds)?
In other words, “nothing can separate you from the love of God” (8:39). Instead, here’s His will, “No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him “. Your lack of feeling love in your life at this point is not to conquer you, but to provide the opportunity to conquer it.
To the dimension you understand the depth of this revelation of God’s love (how wide, how long, how wide and deep it is) … that passes your understanding, is the dimension you will be able to do exceedingly, abundantly, beyond what you can ask, think or imagine in your life (See Ephesians 3:16-20) … according to the power that works within you (His love).
Now, no one expects that reading one article, no matter how true it is, to completely turn the tide in your life. God’s love must become a heart belief. To do that you need to meditate on His love daily. You’ll find scriptures on God’s love and learn how to meditate effectively through two resources I’ve created – the Barrier Busters Instruction Guide or the Barrier Busters Meditation CD (or MP3 download).
Most all know that God loves you unconditionally, and He’s for you.
